BACK TO BASICS

I was thinkin about how things get complicated, confused and eventually off-course. I believe it happens when we move too far away from the basics. Think about it . . . sports always rests on the best basics. Swing the bat through the ball and follow-through; keep the ball in front of you to make the catch -- and always keep your eyes on the ball!!!! The same holds true for other sports, tennis, karate, gymnastics. There are basic concepts and moves upon which mastery is built. School subjects rest on the basics as well. Math requires first and foremost basic understanding and facility with addition, subtraction, multiplication and division. Once those are mastered, you can move into algebra, geometry, etc. In order to read and write, learn to say, recognize and write your ABCs. Spell well and construct good sentences. Build sentences into paragraphs and paragraphs into essays, etc. But, if you haven't mastered the basics, communicating in writing will not be effective. Business works the same. What are the basics? If we excel at the basic level of business, we have the foundation to move forward. If we clean floors for a living, then we must never lose sight of the fact that clean floors are what we are hired to provide. by the way, I know an exceptional man who provides that service and whose personal ethics require that he never give less than his best! A truly exceptional floor cleaning business cannot be built without total attention and dedication to the basic requirement of providing clean floors. Our relationships are the same. What are the basics? Offering ourselves in honesty to each other. Bringng the best we have to offer (and remember, that varies from day to day), and helping to bring out the best in each other. It means working to cover our friends' weaknesses by illuminating their strengths. It means encouraging their right actions while not encouraging harmful actions. It means not speaking behind one anothers' backs. I have learned as a mother of teens that I must often come back to the basics to provide the best for my household. And those basics are: get and keep the house clean -- everyone must be involved; provide my love and encouragement to the members of my house -- there are plenty of other people waiting to take them down outside; be availabloe and be cheerful. Lots of hugs are pretty basic, too. Take some time to consider which parts of your life are sliding off-track and consider getting back to basics!

About Friends

I was thinking... How far do we go for friends? Where do we draw the line? Does there even need to be a line? Would you give up something of great importance or value for a close friend? Would you sacrafice your dream to help a friend achieve theirs? Would they give up theirs for you? What happens when that close friend doesn't go the same distance as you? Do you turn back? try to drag them? What happens when they come to expect outrageous loyalty to you but don't show the same in return? I would suppose the answer would be different for everyone as each of us has different levels of trust and expectance in our lifes. Each of us has different levels of friendship in our lives and each of us has different levels of loyalty in our lives. For me, my closest friends know, I will go the distance for them. Champion for them, cheer for them, be a balcony person for them. They also know I expect the same in return. I am fiercely loyal, unyielding in my support, encouragement and such. However, I don't always get along with my closest friends nor do I always agree with them. That's not what friendship is about. We're individuals, we're different. We think differently, we act differently, we speak differently. We're awesome! WE make great teams. But we're still TWO people, two individual people. I am glad they know that. I'm glad they know they can count on me (and me on them). To all my close friend..thank you for being in my life.

Liquid Sunshine

So, I was thinkin....the other day my daughter sad all this rain makes her SS (Super Sad). Me, I like the variety in weather. That includes having the rain blowing around and the grey skies and all. But some people need an extra boost when the world looks greyer. So, how do we bring sunshine into other people's lives? What brings sunshine into my life? My Shine-Makers: Lori: Always with a great laugh David: Offbeat sense of humor I sometimes forget to pay attention to Paul: Ditto, but gives himself away with his dimples Mimi: Loves the puppies....well, Felicity anyways Elizabeth: Great, wry sense of humor Catherine: Sweet, generous, humorous--never any malice afore/or after! Mom & Dad: Ok, you gotta know sometimes those comments are hilarious So many others who come into and out of my days, my thoughts and my heart. You bring me much joy, which brings me much sunshine. So, now I know the answer when someone says to me, "You're always so happy. How do you do it?" I can say, surround yourself with the Shine-Makers and find a good laugh. I love all of you Shine Makers!

BECOMING

I WAS THINNKIN about becoming. We are always becoming. When I was a baby, I was busy becoming a toddler, then a pre-schooler, then a child, then a pre-teen, then a teen, then a young adult, then a wife, then a mother, now I am busy becoming something more. I keep wondering when this business of becoming will end -- I guess it all ends when life ends. Here's the thing about becoming. It is a never-ending process that can create a false urgency within us, a dissatisfaction for where we currently are. Preteens are well-known for their desire to become 13; at 13, we just wish for 16; at 16 we constantly dream of 18; at 18 we look forward to magic 21. And one of the strongest desires to become occurs during pregnancy, when most women can hardly wait to see, touch and smell their baby! But slow down; don't move too fast; why can't we make the moment last! (Okay, that last line is from a song) There is nothing wrong with looking forward, for we cannot and should not move backwards. But if we spend our time in remembering yesterday or striving for tomorrow, we just might miss the wonderful little miracles of today. Childhood comes only once and should be left behind at the proper time. A teenager is a strong, healthy, beautiful person who is not yet an adult -- and should not be treated by anyone (including themselves) as adults. Adults should be strong and proud of who and what they are -- even if they find they are still on the road of becoming. We are amazing, incredible people. How long has it been since we have each stopped to appreciate who and what we are, right now, on our way to becoming something else? So, I am going to look into the mirror and acknowledge that I like me. Right now, right here. So, what were you thinking?

What I thunk . . .

The other day I helped a friend clean up some things that had blown over in her yard after a big storm, and as we were taking a break I noticed she had a few older local junior aid cookbooks laying around. She told me they were given to her at her wedding as gifts for the new bride. As I picked them up and looked through them I found that I knew quite a few of the contributors, many were clients of mine. Some of them are quite advanced in years now, but it was very interesting reading through the recipes they had contributed and were proud of. It made me imagine them in their homes preparing these foods for a special dinner party or for a family get together. Later in the week I was doing some work at one of their houses and brought up that I had looked at the recipes they had contributed. Suprised, she asked me which recipes and then said she had not cooked some of those things for many years. She went back into her kitchen and returned after a while with the original recipes from her collection and then told me where they had come from and the history behind the dish. A few of them were recipes that had been passed down from her grandmother and had been in the family for years. I could tell from the look in her eyes and change in her voice that she had fond memories of those times and the recipes had brought her back to those times. I remember the time my mom gave me a cookbook of all my favorite recipes she used to make when we were kids. She also found a book her grandmother had given her and passed copies of those on as well. The amazing thing is, whenever I make one of those meals it takes me back to when I was growing up. And if I make one of the recipes of her grandmother, it takes me back to the days we spent playing at her house in the morning and early afternoon before the big afternoon meal. If you cook food that others enjoy, think about writing down your recipes so that you can pass them on to your kids and friends. I think recipes are a kind of legacy between families, regions, cultures. They are a link to our past, a memory of good times, and legacy to our future. And they taste good too!

Reflections

I WAS THINKIN about reflections. Sometimes, they are accurate. Sometimes, they get ruffled and refracted. I don't think we often see true reflections of ourselves. I have noticed that many people see themselves differently than other people see them. My friends will tell me their faults -- hair too straight, hair too curly, hair too thin, hair too thick - (and that's just their hair!). They would never look at me and judge me as harshly as they judge themselves. Could it be that we need to stop looking for flaws and start finding reasons to admire ourselves? If our friends don't reflect back to us someone we like we need to consider: (1) should we change our approach; or (2) should we change our friends? This, of course, is not to say that we need to become haughty and proud. We just need (I believe) to be more honest about our own strengths. Finally, when we see our weaknesses and flaws in the reflections, we need to minimize those by highlighting our strengths. Good friends will do this for us and with us.

OASIS

Micke Grove Zoo provides this wonderful little fountain in the bird area. Stop for a moment in time. Relax and enjoy nature. turn off the cell phones and ipods and other mechanisms of interruption and float for a while. The zoo is just minutes outside of town -- literally, yet the Micke Grove Park provides ample space to play, relax and let go of everyday life. There are wonderful gardens, a historic museum, zoo, rides and lots of space to barbecue, play softball, horshoes, look for crawdads in the stream or just relax on a blanket and watch the squirrels run through the abundance of trees. I haven't yet played the golf course but I hear good things. No matter what draws us to these kinds of areas, it is just important that we leave our "civilised" lives behind occasionally to slow down and enjoy the people we are with and the lives we are priveleged to lead in this country.

REFLECTONS

I was thinkin about reflections. I took this picture along the Mokelumne River in Clements. Truthfully, with the depth of the color of the water, the reflection was better than the reality. Aren't there times in life when that is true? I mean, often my reflection is better coming from friends, family or coworkers. Their love, resect, trust, and confidence shows me in a better light than the harsh light of day. When I grow as a person, it is because I am growing to be more like the reflections I see of myself than the self I often see.

GOODBYE GRANDMA BETTY

BEAUTIFUL I WAS THINKIN about beauty. What really is beauty? Is it being seventeen forever? Is it perfect, clear skin? Is it long, thick, lush hair? Is it a perfectly proportioned, toned, fit body? This beautiful lady couldn't make a claim to any of those attributes when I met her nine years ago. She was just a sweet, darling little lady. Then I was fortunate enough to begin to know her. First and foremost, Betty Beutler is a Christian. She never wanted anyone to mistake that. And it couldn't be mistaken. Because Betty is one of those very rare Christians who really exemplifies Christ's love. Grandma Betty came to Lodi with her husband in the 50s. They came because her pastor husband's health required a moderate climate. In 1963, only a few years after moving to Lodi, Grandma Betty started another new chapter in life -- she became a widow. Grandma Betty stayed in Lodi. No family lived here. Some in other states and some in Canada, but none in Lodi. Grandma Betty stayed in Lodi. And I am so glad she did. When I cam to Lodi 9 years ago, I was heartbroken. I was just separated from my husband of 12 years with two small children. I would meet Grandma Betty in my first year here in Lodi when I started to attend First Baptist Church. We were in a bible study group together. I learned that she was widowed and happily living a life of purpose and satisfaction. She had tremendous sympathy for me, but never suggested that I should be anything less than a complete woman on my own. Grandma Betty kept her focus on God for strength, courage and comfort and she shared that with all who came near. In that last few years, it was my privelge to see Grandma Betty in my profession as a massage therapist. I always gave my best to her; but somehow I received more than I gave. That is just the kind of gentle, incredible woman God put into my life for a while. Grandma Betty never owned a house. She never had a lot to speak of. Grandma Betty was one of the richest women I have ever known. She had tremendous sway with those who knew her. Seldom did you find Grandma Betty alone. Grandma Betty is loved and admired by the First Baptist Church family. We will be grateful for the lessons she taught us and the love she freely gave us. Thank you, Grandma Betty, for providing such an incredible role model. Beauty is as beauty lives and you, Grandma Betty are one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen!

ANOTHER OF MY HEROES

This is Paul. He is an incredible guy. He faces life with courage and strength. He helps others to laugh. Paul is 14. He is a karate student who has competed in national events. And he never intentionally hurts anyone outside of that competition. If you want a nice animal, just let Paul hang out with your pet. He is so mellow that his cats and dogs are always the friendliest on the block. Need someone to care? Just let Paul know that you are having problems. Need friendship? Now you are talking Paul's language. The only times he has had real trouble at school have been because he was defending a friend -- usually from a bully. I like Paul. I like to hang out with him, laugh with him & hear his thoughts.

Challenges

I was thinking about challenges. How do we learn to take on the challenge, push through the challenge and complete the challenge? How many successes does it take to make us confident when facing new challenges? How many successes does it take to give us energy to push through the bigger challenges? Would we only be happy with big challenges or little challenges? I like to have a variety of challenges. Like everyone, I prefer to "win" and succesfully complete my challenges. But, honestly, I've probably learned as much from unsuccesses....maybe more since I think I've had more losses than wins (ha ha). Anyway, I want to help my children and other people to be able to take on challenges, find the successes, learn from the failures and successes and go on to do greater things.

PATHWAYS

I was thinkin about paths. In our lives we will have to choose our path repeatedly. Normally, we will only be able to see just some distance down the path. So, how do we know it is the right path? First, find out what you know and don't know about the path. How long is it? Where is it going? What obstacles lie on the path? What glories and honors lie on the path. Is it going where you want? How long will it take? Ask someone who has already traveled the path. Prepare yourself for the journey Gird your loins Go forth and conquer or go another way!!

ANIMAL TESTING

I was thinkin about my pets. I love them. We have had: mice, birds, cats, dogs, rabbits, and hamsters. They are always "part of the family." That's why they go to the vets, get immunizations and have special foods bought just for them. Additionally, they live in our house and are provided for their comfort. So, I don't believe that they should be used unnecessarily for testing. I have read accounts of cosmetics being injected into rabbits' eyes; shampoos & fragrances injected under the skin and into the bloodstream. Why? Do women really put hair color and cosmetics into their bodies that way? Don't we know yet what ingredients are safe and which ones aren't? Are we not sufficiently knowledgeable to create products and test them on willing human volunteers? And forget about what the psychologists do. Really, is it necessary to attach electrodes to monkeys, cause them pain, just to register their reaction? If the only goal is to determine that pain causes the monkeys to flinch and pull away, then let's use the psychology students to determine this! However. If we have done all that we can to test certain drugs or treatments to determine their efficacy in treating cancers or other life-threatening diseases, then let's use animals as humanely as possible. we have untold numbers of unwanted cats and dogs in this country. Rabbits are well known for their breeding abilities. Humane treatment is an absolute must. I would be willing to see my own animal used if it meant the ability to save someone's life, stop the progression of a disease such as Alzheimers, multiple sclerosis or diabetes. Using animals for scientific testing raises so many questions and emotions. There really are no easy, clear-cut answers.

NEW YEAR

I was thinkin about the new year. 2008. I know it will be great! So, we have twelve months. How about twelve goals? 1. Be healthier -- this is not get healthier it is BE healthier For me, eat better, sleep better, workout. LAUGH more, LOVE more, LIVE more 2. Be richer -- How much we have is more of a state of mind than a state of bottom line. Let's face it, bottom lines change. But rich people are always rich. I have as much as I need for all that I truly want. 3. Be stronger -- Strength is internal. I believe in myself and others will also. I don't have to be perfect to be acceptable. I don't expect perfection from others, so I will give myself a break and start looking at myself in a more positive way 4. Be responsible -- I am 100% responsible for myself. Everything in my life is a result of my choices -- I bring it all on by the decisions I make. That means that I can choose to change the things that are in my life; I can get rid of things I don't like to make room for bringing in more thing I do like. 5. Adventure -- Allow myself to accept new challenges. Physical, emotional or mental. 6. Relax -- Take more time off to do what I feel like doing. 7. Organize! Get rid of what hinders and put away the rest! 8. Set more goals. 9. Celebrate myself -- acknowledge achievements. 10. Celebrate my life -- I have lots of wonderful people that I need to stop and appreciate. 11. Be grateful to God. He has allowed me life, freedom, health, wealth, laughter, love, work, play, family, friends, everything. 12. Give to someone else.